I confess: I don't know what Taylor Swift sings. My knowledge of her music extends to the fact that she once wrote something that she made a music video about that went onto win a VMA, and I only know that because Kanye West was somehow involved, right? Okay, I might be familiar with her acting career, that is, if I were to admit to seeing the film Valentine's Day, which I'm not sure I'm prepared to do.

So basically I don't know much about her, except that she seems nice enough, and like she probably uses the phrase "super duper," and that she dated Jake Gyllenhaal.

Here's what else I know: She dresses like she actually lives in Pleasantville, which is awesome. Every flirty '50s dress, every Bye Bye Birdie headband, every polka dot pant, every gleaming strand of pearls, screams "ship my boyfriend off to war and put me in technicolor."

This is not country star behavior. Country stars are supposed to wear flowers tucked behind their ears, and denim-on-denim for casual times and ruffled, spangled denim for fancy times. Meanwhile, Swift looks like she's on her way to Joanie and Chachi's for a dinner party. At all times.

And did I mention her hair? So very blonde and old Hollywood. And her lips? So very red and femme fatale-y, adding a welcome splash of sultry and a sense of occassion. It really makes you wonder how she's not starring in one of those "fabric of my life" cotton ads. Talk about a missed opportunity.